Sit with your grandparents or great grandparents if you still have one
or old couples, ask them what their opinion is on this topic, they'll tell you
one thing in common..."patience and prayer". Here's what i can say in
my opinion cumulative with hearings from my mum, mother-law and some old
couples. The secret of a solid long lasting marriage first would be God,
continuous prayers because the devil wants marriages destroyed, this is because
the union between a man and wife is likened to Christ and the church “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the
church and gave himself up for her" Eph 5:25. Next would be honesty,
no secrets, communication, a good foundation and
then patience and love. Another thing is to change yourself
and the way you handle issues in your home rather than trying to change your
husband. Never fight in public and never let intimacy die. When you quarrel,
never forget that you are on the same team. There should be something you both
do together, never stop dating.
God:
You need His presence in your life and you need to communicate your
fears and worries through prayers to him, in your most noisy situation there is
always a quiet time to speak to him with a clear heart, trust me a pure
and contrite spirit the Lord hears. So long as you are clean in heart God will
be with you and your family in trying times. In fact this is the greatest of
all others as it covers them. And as a wife your husband needs your prayers,
never stop praying for him, you both are one and what affect him affects you
and vice versa. Pray also for your children.
"Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build
it." Psalm 127:1. "In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he
shall direct thy paths." Proverbs 3:6 "And the peace of God,
which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through
Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:7
No secrets:
There is one thing that does not like to be hidden for so long, and
that’s secret. Try all you can not to keep them because when they eventually
surface, it becomes disastrous. Be honest at all times. This builds trust
Patience:
There is no gift as much as been patience, it cools a tempered spouse,
it speaks for itself through piercing ones heart, imagine been a messy
situation with your spouse and rather than fighting each other, you keep calm
and become patient with the situation, you see that the other partner will feel
remorse and change even if it is not immediate
Love:
This is the basis for everything. I guess you married your spouse
because you love him/her. Let that love continue to fire up even after the
children, because when there is no love and the wind blows, it will blow the
partners to separate direction but when there is love both partners will be
blown to the same direction and stand unshaken
Communication:
Be open, voice out your feelings. Men most times cannot figure out why
you are moody or acting up except you actually tell them, and when you don’t
and you keep that face long, it gets them angry and they try giving you some
alone time. So talk talk talk
A good foundation: The beginning of any
project is not always easy. Let’s think of the relationship between parents and children. At first
children feel punished and parents feel stressed though interesting but not
until later in the future both the parents and children enjoy the beauty of
that beginning which is why the bond is strong and there is love. let’s see
another relationship between a Christian and
our creator, been a Christian in the beginning is not
an easy task because a lot has to be let gone and a lot is involved and
later we see the beauty there is in it and we enjoy it.
likewise in a marriage,
because you both come from different backgrounds, you both are not
brother/sister, and it’s a different teaching/culture, living together will
take some time to adjust and just like Christianity and living with one
parents, we begin to enjoy it and see the blessings that awaits.
God will ride us through this journey, Amen.
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